- April 24, 2024
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Dear Editor:
This uprising over the Wounded Warrior Project flag in the backyard of Grand Haven needs to stop.
Let’s point out the obvious:
1. Grand Haven is a semi-exclusive community with its own Home Owners Association. If you don’t like the rules, don’t buy there. (Veterans sacrificed for you to choose where to live, not to be used like this.)
2. There is nothing saying this gentleman cannot fly his flag. He just can’t fly it in the backyard. The backyard only allows for government-approved flags.
3. Wounded Warrior Project is a private, nonprofit 501(c) organization. And, at the very least, we can consider them a questionable charitable organization. But if you did your research, you would know that.
I am sure those three points flew over many people’s heads, because frankly, America (and Flagler) is too busy chanting “U-S-A” at ballgames and grilling hot dogs and slinging beers at the Memorial Day barbecue.
This flag issue is a classic example of an out-of-touch America with today’s military. We certainly appreciate the support, but instead of believing that we care about a flag like this, why not ask us the issues we would like for you to stand up and help us defend and advocate for?
As a 26-year Flagler County resident who now lives in Washington state while my wife serves in the U.S. Army, these are the issues I promise you matter to us:
1. Health care. There is a universal concern over our health care, but mental health is the big one. We are losing too many veterans and active duty service members to suicide. Quality help at both a military treatment facility and the Veterans Affairs are hard to come by. Proper care could help keep families together, as well.
2. Retirement. The budget deal passed in December takes away approximately $84,000 from a 20-year enlisted retiree and $103,000 from someone who retires as an officer. This is happening through what is called a “COLA reduction.”
3. Jobs. Veterans have a really hard time transitioning from military life to civilian life (high rate of homelessness amongst vets, as well). Jobs are also a concern for military spouses. Most companies are not interested in hiring someone who will only be in that location for 2-4 years, moving at the Department of Defense’s every whim. There is also a serious issue facing military spouses with specific licenses, like teachers, lawyers, health care, etc. By the time a professional recertifies in each state they move to, it could be time for them to move again.
4. Marital entitlements. Stand on whichever side of the same-sex-marriage fence you want, but how can we tell someone who stands by and watches the love of their life deploy (and possibly die) that they do not get any benefits?
I could go on and on with a list of issues that actually matter to military families, but something tells me most of you think that our homecomings resemble that Budweiser Super Bowl ad, and whatever I say will fall on deaf ears/eyes. Let me assure you, that is not what it is like at all.
In the 45 months since my wife enlisted in the Army, she has been gone more than half of them, missing out on more memories than I care to think about.
We are Flagler County homeowners with homestead exemption that are also registered to vote in Flagler County (are you reading this, Congressman DeSantis?), although we have lived in Texas, Kansas and now Washington in those 45 months.
We are your average American military family. And while I won’t dare speak for my wife, I will say loudly: I can care less about that dumb Wounded Warrior flag. That flag matters little. I would use it as toilet paper if I had to — something I wouldn’t do with the flags he is allowed to fly in his backyard.
So please, stop the madness. If you really want to have a conversation about what matters to American military families, ask us. And if you really want to support us, get to know us. Get to know what we need.
Wayne C. Perry is a Palm Coast homeowner, Joint Base Lewis-McCord Spouse of the Year in 2014
